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[perfectsymmetry]

[ACTION: Are you new in town? Wandering around looking lost? Staring and gawking at the drones and identical houses with a growing look of dread across your face?

If so, a tall teenager will shyly approach you. He's carrying a newspaper bag, but instead of the daily news, there are pamphlets poking out. He has a quiet voice and a light Irish accent.]

Ah, um, excuse me. Couldn't help but notice that you, um, seem to be feeling your out of place. I can explain, if you's like.

--

[PHONE:]

Um.

N-No one's seriously considering the position of police chief, right? It's so suspicious... what if you get droned into the role, like Grad-- er, Evan Olney probably was?

Comments

[doofenstrudel]

[[OOC: Excellent, thank you! :D]]

Social experiment....

[The pamphlet was read. Intently, oh so intently. Doofenshmirtz's expression went from blandly disinterested, to very interested indeed, to absolutely apalled.]

This... this doesn't even make any sense! There's no motive behind it! No... no reason for all of the...

[He gropes at the air, words escaping him.]

[perfektsymmetry.livejournal.com]

[Crowe agrees with the sentiment, though in his usual reserved way. He just nods.]

I-I know. It's terrible. I'd like to think there's some reason for it all, n-not just... mindless torture. Lucy Smith will be the only one with answers, though, and she's not about to tell us.

[doofenstrudel]

Lucy Smith...

[He fishes a pen from his pocket, and makes sure to circle that name a few times. And then underline it.]

Speaking as a villain with no small amount of experience in scheming and being horrible, I'd like to think there's some reason for this. We may just not know it. These things can be... obscure. Childhood trauma and... so on.

[Awkward cough. He folds the pamphlet up, and tucks it into his pocket.]

So how long have you been here? How much of this have you lived through?

[perfektsymmetry.livejournal.com]

Ah, according to the pamphlet, I've been here since March of Year 2. [He looks downcast at the mere thought.]

W-Wait... did you say you're a villain?

[doofenstrudel]

I see. My condolences.

[He puffs up slightly.]

Yes! Of course I am! But I've never done something like this! [He gestures around at Mayfield in general.] What do you take me for?! I'm evil, I'm not a monster!

[perfektsymmetry.livejournal.com]

[Crowe just... blinks at him. He's close family friends with a super villain back home. Comparatively, this guy didn't seem like the type. But that was probably a good thing.]

I-If you say so, sir. "Evil" doesn't quite begin to cover this place.

[doofenstrudel]

You've probably never heard of Heinz Doofenshmirtz... but that is me! I'm... well alright, I'm not exactly notorious, but I'm getting there!

...I was getting there.

[Sigh. This place is depressing.]

Thank you for the information. I should be getting home.

[perfektsymmetry.livejournal.com]

A-Ah, well, we probably don't come from the same place, yeah? Maybe that's why I never heard the name.

Sure. Um, if you have any other questions, just ask, yeah? My name's Crowe.

[doofenstrudel]

[Yes! A chance to recover some ego points!]

Ah! Right, of course we're not from the same place! It would be only natural that you have not heard of me. Ha ha.

Maybe I'll give you a call, once I've had time to think this all over.

[perfektsymmetry.livejournal.com]

Of course. Dist is the person who wrote this. If you have any new info to give, give him a call.

[doofenstrudel]

I think I will...

[He turns to go, brow furrowed in thought.]